Phrases I hate. #1. Armies of Compassion
I want to say to Bush, "Stop trying to make Armies of Compassion happen!"
And to Karen Huges, who no doubt created it, "Quit while you are ahead, sister.
You had a winner with the bullshit phrase compassionate conservative, put a fork in this one... "
How do I hate it? Let me count the ways. To me it takes the transcendent power of compassion and grafts on to it the hulking brainlessness of some mindless military. It is onward Christian Soldiers for the new century. These words are not two great tastes that taste great together. It bastardizes the word compassion. It cripples the power of the word Armies. Knock it off.
Think about it, can you image armies of compassion marching toward you? It would scare the shit out of me. I envision big ghoulish, Jimmy Swaggart type smiles peering out from their Kevlar Nazi helmets. Maybe some are wearing goth makeup as they weep and wale in compassion while trampling the heathens on the way to good Christians.
# 2 Phrase I hate. The Homeland
If you are like me, the first time you heard this you wanted to hurl. "The Homeland? The HOMELAND? What are we, fucking Germany during World War II? No one in the HISTORY of America had every referred to America as "The Homeland" until some dweeb in a brainstorm session came up with this. What's wrong with just plain ol' America? Who likes this phrase? Anyone? Hearing it just makes my skin crawl. It makes me want to wash my ears out with Borax.
This was probably Karen Huges again. She is the queen of crappy catch phrases that get stuck in your head like bad songs.
Hey Karen, do us all a favor and go listen to the Bananaphone Song for awhile. Now you know what is like for us when we hear your phrases used.
I dedicate this post to a long lost friend who called me out of the blue the other day. If you are reading this sing out, sign on and give yourself a nickname so I can count you as my 16th reader.
And to Karen Huges, who no doubt created it, "Quit while you are ahead, sister.
You had a winner with the bullshit phrase compassionate conservative, put a fork in this one... "
How do I hate it? Let me count the ways. To me it takes the transcendent power of compassion and grafts on to it the hulking brainlessness of some mindless military. It is onward Christian Soldiers for the new century. These words are not two great tastes that taste great together. It bastardizes the word compassion. It cripples the power of the word Armies. Knock it off.
Think about it, can you image armies of compassion marching toward you? It would scare the shit out of me. I envision big ghoulish, Jimmy Swaggart type smiles peering out from their Kevlar Nazi helmets. Maybe some are wearing goth makeup as they weep and wale in compassion while trampling the heathens on the way to good Christians.
# 2 Phrase I hate. The Homeland
If you are like me, the first time you heard this you wanted to hurl. "The Homeland? The HOMELAND? What are we, fucking Germany during World War II? No one in the HISTORY of America had every referred to America as "The Homeland" until some dweeb in a brainstorm session came up with this. What's wrong with just plain ol' America? Who likes this phrase? Anyone? Hearing it just makes my skin crawl. It makes me want to wash my ears out with Borax.
This was probably Karen Huges again. She is the queen of crappy catch phrases that get stuck in your head like bad songs.
Hey Karen, do us all a favor and go listen to the Bananaphone Song for awhile. Now you know what is like for us when we hear your phrases used.
I dedicate this post to a long lost friend who called me out of the blue the other day. If you are reading this sing out, sign on and give yourself a nickname so I can count you as my 16th reader.
5 Comments:
Not the friend you are looking for, but you've been boingboinged! Love this blog, I will bookmark it forever.
I am most flattered. You are very welcome here.
I spent a lovely week in Kentucky at few years ago. It was during the time I was reading Seabiscuit and so I went on a tour of the horse farms. Very beautiful.
Thanks for posting!
LLAP,
Spocko
Okay Spocko! I take your BananananaPhone and raise you one Badger!: http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/badgers.php
I am interested to know specificaly why you dislike the term "Homeland". I think it is a very endearing term. I cannot for the life of me understand why endowing your own country with a term of endearment would make you sick.
The fact that it was recently coined shouldn't have any more bearing on it's value than the previously non-word "blog", which could easily be covered under the term online discussion.
I am completely baffled.
oh, that freaking bananaphone song... I just... CAN'T GET RID OF IT! I have to bore a hole in my skull now to let it OUT OF MY HEAD! WHY GOD WHY!
Post a Comment
<< Home